


In My Way

by swallowthewhale



Category: Glee
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-19
Updated: 2015-09-19
Packaged: 2018-04-21 10:58:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,011
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4826564
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/swallowthewhale/pseuds/swallowthewhale
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Blaine has just transferred from Dalton to McKinley, but the boy he thought would be his first friend is giving him the cold shoulder.</p>
            </blockquote>





	In My Way

McKinley is nothing like Dalton. The classes are jokes, the teachers don’t care, and the students are just plain cruel. He’s slushied twice on his first day, and slammed into lockers so many times he knows the bruises probably won’t fade for several days. It isn’t that he didn’t know to expect that stuff. It’s just that Dalton had made him forget to be expecting it every moment of the day. He doesn’t have a change of clothes, so he goes to the bathroom and washes off what he can, then wears his red-stained clothes with his chin held high for the rest of the day. Then he signs up for the New Directions.

He quickly makes friends with Mike and Tina and Sam. He learns that it’s best to just ignore Kurt’s barbs and Santana’s snippy comments. He lets Rachel draw him into preparing a duet and accepts Finn’s invitation to watch football together sometime. He engages in a very serious conversation with Brittany about her cat’s dependence on alcohol and gambling. He paints on a bright smile and pretends that he’s not homesick for Dalton.

Life at McKinley is actually much simpler than he thought it would be, despite the drama. Mercedes and Tina invite him to hang out after school and draw him a relationship chart so that he can catch up on the glee club history and regale him with stories from the past year and a half. They give him a list of soaps that will get out the stain slushies leave on clothes and skin, and a map of the school marked with the best bathrooms and safest hallways. He pretends it doesn’t hurt that Kurt seems to hate him for no good reason.

At lunch he’s watching Kurt gossiping with Mercedes out of the corner of his eye while poking at his salad and tuning out Rachel’s shrilly plans of yet another solo. It’s not until Tina, sitting on his other side, pokes his arm, that he jumps and turns his attention to them.

He shoots Rachel a bright smile. “Sorry what?”

She huffs and tosses her hair over a shoulder. “I was asking if you have a girlfriend, Blaine Warbler.”

He sees Kurt looking up, but keeps his eyes fixed on Rachel while he furrows his brow. “Um. I’m gay, Rach. I thought you knew.”

Rachel blinks. An indecipherable look passes over Kurt’s face before he stands abruptly and stalks off. Blaine turns his attention back to Rachel. “ - support you completely. I have two gay dads and I must say that I know how hard it can be sometimes. I admit that while I’ve never gone through exactly that, I do know what it’s like to be an outcast. You see, being a small, Jewish, and very talented singer with several rather demanding positions in - ”

Blaine lets his gaze drift to Kurt’s empty seat. Mercedes, who was sitting next to him, is gone as well.

“Kurt is gay, too,” Tina says quietly in his ear. “In case you were wondering.”

He nods slightly, still a little dazed by the anger he could swear he saw in Kurt’s expression.

\---

“Is Kurt out?” Blaine asks Tina tentatively that afternoon, working on their math homework in his room.

Tina sighs and crosses her legs, pushing her book off her lap. “Yeah. He has been for a while now. He’s been the only out kid at McKinley for, well, ever.”

He stares at her. “There’s no one else?”

Tina shrugs. “No one who’s admitted it yet. If you haven’t noticed, Kurt stands out a little. And he doesn’t make an effort to hide that.” She tilts her head, considering. “Actually, he goes out of his way to stand out. Sort of as a big fuck you to all the people that keep telling him that being him is wrong.”

Blains picks at his bed cover. “I get that,” he mumbles.

Tina’s quiet for a long moment. “Were you out at your old school?”

“Hmm? Oh, Dalton? Yeah. I transferred there because of its no-bullying policy.”

“And before that?” Tina asks gently.

Blaine avoids her eyes. “For a long time, no. Not until the end of my freshman year. But out or not, it didn’t stop people from shoving me around and calling me names.”

Tina rests a hand on his knee and he does his best not to jump at the contact.

\---

It’s when Blaine finds himself walking out, angry, of a third Glee rehearsal in one week that he decides something needs to be done. He could ask Tina for advice, or even Mercedes, but they’re both friends with Kurt and would most likely relay the information on to him. And that would just make things worse. He could ask Finn or Mike, but they either wouldn’t know how to help or tell Kurt as well. Or both.

So instead he goes to the gym and takes his anger out on a punching bag. He’s never been any good at witty comebacks or using words to cut others down. He prefers smiling politely and keeping his mouth shut. It’s easier and saves him from inevitable embarrassment. Especially here, where everyone seems to know exactly which words will tear him down the most.

“Anderson.” He recognizes the sharp voice to be Kurt’s, and keeps slamming at the bag.

“What?” he growls, refusing to look at him.

The silence is filled only with the slap of Blaine’s hands on the punching bag.

“Will you just talk to me?” Kurt asks, voice soft.

He whirls to face him, suddenly furious. “What? Like you’ve ever “just talked” to me? What is your problem with me anyway? Ever since I got here you’ve given me nothing but crap.”

Kurt looks slightly taken aback. “I was jealous.”

Blaine stares at him. “You were jealous? Of me?”

Kurt nods stiffly. “You’re as out and proud as it gets. I tried that. It didn’t really work out for me.”

Blaine laughs incredulously. “I’m out and proud? Hardly. I ran away to Dalton for two years and hid behind blazers and four-part harmonies because I couldn’t handle being out at my old school. Even here I didn’t tell anyone I was gay until they asked.”

Kurt raises a brow slightly. “So you’re saying you get slushied because you dress well and sing in glee club?”

Blaine shrugs, tugging at his gloves. “They’ll think whatever they like, as long as it’s an excuse to put other people down.”

Kurt doesn’t reply.

“Anyway, you’re about as out and proud as I am, so I still don’t understand why you’re jealous.”

Kurt sighs. “I used to be. Out and proud. I love fashion, and I never hid it. I’m in glee, I have a high voice, I’m effeminate. But in the end I joined the Cheerios because the uniform provides protection and I couldn’t handle being tossed in the dumpster anymore.”

Blaine feels like there’s more to the story than Kurt’s saying, but suddenly he can’t help the anger pushing its way through. “So you decided to treat the only other person who might get it like shit? You don’t think that maybe, just maybe, I would understand?”

Kurt scoffs, eyes hardening. “Oh yeah. You’ve had a real tough life. I’m sure Dalton was hell.”

“You don’t know anything about me,” Blaine snarls.

“And you don’t know anything about me,” Kurt snaps back. “I was almost chased out of my school because of some jerk who kissed me and then threatened to kill me!”

“And I actually was chased out of my school by a bunch of guys who really did try to kill me!” Blaine yells and Kurt falls silent. “And I’m not saying that diminishes what you’ve gone through, but just remember that I’m not perfect either. My life isn’t perfect. Dalton was great, yeah, but it wasn’t real life. My first high school was real life. Getting beaten up for taking a boy to a dance, my dad spending a summer fixing up a car with me because he thinks it’ll “straighten me out” is real life. McKinley is real life. There are people full of hate and resentment for things they don’t understand, and I can deal with that. That can be changed. But you of all people, treating me like - like trash because you think you’ve gone through worse. That’s… I expected more.”

Blaine tears off his gloves and stalks past Kurt.

“Let me know when you get your head out of your ass and realize that you’re not the only person in this school who’s had a rough time of things.”

He doesn’t slam the door, even though he wants to.

\---

The next day in glee, Blaine sings an acoustic mash-up of Misery and This Love. The day after, Kurt sings I Wanna Hold Your Hand and Blaine feels even more confused than ever when Kurt’s eyes keep drifting toward him throughout the performance. Blaine replies with Cough Syrup, then Kurt sings Hold My Heart, and Blaine digs his guitar out for On the Way Down. And on it goes. Then Kurt sings Blackbird one day, and Blaine can’t come up with a reply.

Kurt finds him in the auditorium, spinning easily through some of the moves Brittany and Mike had been teaching them that afternoon. Kurt waits quietly, keeping his hands tucked in his pockets, until Blaine stops and turns to face him.

“Hi.”

“Hey,” Blaine says. “You’re not in your uniform.”

Kurt smiles a little. “Yeah. I, um, I wanted to just be me, when I did this.”

Blaine looks confused. “Did what?”

“Apologize.”

Blaine settles back on his heels, surprised.

Kurt hunches his shoulders a little. “Blaine, I am so sorry about the way I’ve been treating you, and those things I said last week. You’re right. I’ve been so focused on my own problems that I forgot that there’s other people with worse lives.”

Blaine shakes his head. “I didn’t say worse.”

Kurt shrugs. “I did. Because it’s true. I was bullied a lot, and I lost my first kiss to an in-the-closet Neanderthal who made my life a living hell, but I’ve got an amazing dad who supports me no matter what, and I have Carole and Finn and Mercedes and Rachel and the rest of the glee club. It could be so much worse, so much worse. And I need to thank you for showing me that.”

Blaine sighs, shifting on his feet. “C’mere,” he says, waving his hand absently.

Kurt moves closer uncertainly.

“Give me your hand.” He takes Kurt hand in both of his. “And hold it to your heart.”

“Just like the song?” Kurt jokes, trying to ignore the strike of heat at the touch of Blaine’s hand.

Blaine just smiles. “Like the song.”

Kurt smiles back, suddenly noticing how small Blaine actually is. Today, with his clothes much simpler than usual and dark eyes wide with something that looks a lot like fear, he seems almost fragile. Kurt can’t help but want to wrap him up in his arms and protect him from the world.

“Kurt, there is a moment when you say to yourself _Oh, there you are. I’ve been looking for you forever_. Watching you do Blackbird yesterday…” He trails off. “You move me, Kurt. And maybe you can’t change all at once, but I’ve seen the real you. When you sing. And I like him. A lot.”

Kurt’s not sure who leans in first, but all that matters is that they met in the middle, noses sliding together before their lips meet. Blaine’s arm wraps around his waist and Kurt drapes his arms around Blaine’s neck as they kiss, slowly, sweetly. It’s everything he wanted his first kiss to be. Blaine tilts his head up slightly and suddenly their lips are slotted together perfectly. Kurt can’t help but feel like their bodies were made for each other. He pulls away first, Blaine following his mouth blindly.

  
“You take my breath away,” Kurt whispers into Blaine’s cheek.

Blaine just smiles.


End file.
